Monday 18 May 2020

Lockdown diary // dealing with anxiety and trying to find home delivery slots

How has life changed?

Life has obviously changed, but in other ways, life hasn't changed at all. Mr Curiouser and Curiouser usually works from home four days a week and now he works all five days from home (so hardly a big change for him!). We have always been happy pottering around the garden, cooking together, sorting bits around the house and huddling under blankets watching episodes and movies. So being enforced to stay at home isn't a big deal for us compared to couples who go out lots or take lots of holidays who will have more of an adjustment at this time. I just feel so lucky that we live together and have each other. But like I spoke about here, there are aspects of 'before' that you suddenly feel all the more grateful for.

Home delivery slots are like gold dust

The shift we have been finding difficult is getting our hands on supplies. At one stage we weren't able to get a home delivery for love nor money. At the start (before the #stayhome enforcement) we would stay close to home, picking up supplies from the local shops. When it all ramped up, we collectively agreed not to go out as it wasn't worth the risk. Then there was a surge of crime of opportunity with local muggings and house robberies (just disgusting), and 'delightful' groups of teenagers spitting on people ("now you're infected!"). So understandably we have zero desire to step outside for the foreseeable future. But if supplies ever ran out, we'd of course have to reassess that.

This has been easier said than done. All home delivery slots were snapped up. Certain supermarkets weren't accepting new customers and would boot you off the site if you tried to sign up. Others were prioritising the vulnerable and NHS (this I applaud and can't get mad at).

After a few sleepless nights, we were up early one morning and by stroke of luck, managed to find a home delivery slot FOR THE VERY NEXT DAY (how we managed this, I still don't know). It was the biggest (well, most expensive) shop we've ever done as we couldn't guarantee when we would next be able to get food. Only six items couldn't be delivered and we had 16 substitutions - so overall we were really impressed with our first ever Asda home delivery.

The earliest home delivery we could get after that was for a month later which came from Tesco and was even better (everything delivered and only 6 substitutions). I'm not confident how we will be looking this time next month, but I'm currently planning three weeks of meals at a time (largely thanks to this spreadsheet) so I'm prepared if we have a wait ahead of us!

Being resourceful

Amid the fear of running out of food, I have been saving scraps and seeds from fruit and vegetables and putting a few garlic cloves and potatoes aside, which fingers crossed I can grow more from. Fresh herbs from the garden have gone into meals (rosemary roast potatoes being a highlight) and I have also been ransacking the cupboards and finding out of date ingredients which are still perfectly fine. The out of date baked beans and ginger cake were both full of sugar, so perfectly preserved. I also found a TGI Fridays sriracha rub which expired in 2018 (ha). It used to be orange / red in colour and had clumped together into a sad looking grey colour. I scooped the contents out into a pestle and mortar, crushed it into a fine power and revived it back to its original colour (plus it smelt the same as it did before which is always a good sign!). I added a dash of olive oil and salt to made a marinade and added steaks which bathed in the mixture for a few hours. It was the highlight meal of the week (and still super spicy despite being years old!).

Panic (but not at the disco)

Around the time the lockdown enforcement occurred, I needed the post office and walked alone to our nearest one, only to find it was closed and not advertised as so online. I was panicked enough about going outside, so discovering I had gone outside for nothing, was frustrating. Particularly as the people I passed had no concept of social distancing.

I came back home, paid for online postage, walked down the road to the post box, and legged it back. Whilst I was quick and kept my distance from other people, the panic I experienced wasn't worth it. I came back and my head was pounding, my chest tight, and I found it hard to breathe. All classic signs of a panic attack. But naturally, I was fearing the worst at this point.

So whilst the prospect of potentially not being able to get a food delivery next month terrifies me, I know that going outside terrifies me more! I am already a hypochondriac and worrier by nature, but I fear once this is all over that I will be a fully fledged agoraphobic!


Nestled amongst the negativity on social media and tales of d**kery of some people, it's been lovely hearing about communities and families coming together (even if in different households). I received a call from my family one day saying they had managed to score a home delivery and was there anything I needed. I didn't want to take advantage so only asked for a few things that we couldn't get in our shop. My family stopped by the following day to drop a bag off at our door, plus collect the one I'd left for them (I didn't have much to offer them, but gave them fresh herbs from the garden, wine, books and magazines). Considering I'd only asked for a couple of things, I was blown away when I brought this bag inside:

Lockdown care package

I'd almost forgotten what fresh fruit looked like! It was a very emotional moment. Not just because of their generosity, but also the sadness of having to wave from the window and not be able to hug them or make contact. My Mum had even made a lemon drizzle cake and brought that round. She even apologised afterwards saying she took it out of the oven and it was under so she put it back into the oven and that was a mistake as it's now black around the edges. But that's the amazing woman she is. Always thoughtful and always thinking of other people.

How are you lovely lot doing?

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